The other day I did a Christmassy norty.  My Dad had been to the pub (with me) and his guard was down (a bit).  We were in the kitchen where My Mum was preparing dinner, and My Dad had left the stairgate a tiny bit open.  Now, as you know, I can be very stealth, so I snuck into the living room and helped myself to a choccy from the box that My Dad had carelessly left open on the floor.  Not that it would have mattered if it had been shut:  I can easily find my way into a box!  I was quickly missed and My Mum was hot on my heels.  I only had time to snaffle one Thornton's chocolate!  I wish I could have had more cos 'twas YUM!  

Well this week I've excelled myself and I've managed to maintain a good level of naughtiness all week.  The pinnacle, however, came on Thursday when a very nice man came to fix the washing machine.  For some reason, my electrical expertise was not required and rifling through the man's box of tools was deemed inappropriate so I was sent to the front room with my mat. This was a bit of a treat because I'm usually only allowed in there during the evening.   My Mum was busy in her pre-Christmas preparations for Pre-School and was up and down the stairs, risking leaving the stair gate open whilst I slept soundly (or so she thought) on my mat.
Finally, the opportunity presented itself:  My Mum was talking to the nice man and discussing when he could come back with the new part the machine needed so I snuck upstairs for a mooch.  Now usually, the only place of any interest is the bin in the study.  Sometimes there is a wrapper in there and occasionally an apple core, but I struck gold.  In My Mum's bedroom (which, is very much out-of-bounds to me, but who was to know) I found some bags containing Christmas shopping and low and behold a box of Roses chocolates.  I worked swiftly and managed to nibble a hole in one corner just big enough to get to the chocolates.  Unfortunately, I was discovered whilst still munching through my first one which was quite chewy and I got a BIG telling off.  I was marched, unceremoniously, downstairs and put out in the garden. No matter, 'twas YUM!  

That evening, My Mum was regaling My Dad with the story and he too had a moment of carelessness.  He put the slice of bread he was about to butter, down on the side in the kitchen and I seized my opportunity and popped my head between their arms and stole my prize.  Another big telling off, some very rude words and again I was put out in the garden where I was able to eat my piece of bread in peace.  'Twas YUM!  

I did another one!
Yesterday morning, I got a big telling off from Tom when he discovered that I'd helped myself to the new pot of butter.  It had just a scraping or two removed so it was almost like a new page, and very, very tempting.
I was put out in the garden, where I found more norties to do, and then I spent much of the rest of the day licking my buttery whiskers.  YUM!  

Today when My Mum went down the garden to put the hens away, I pretended to be sound asleep.  When she came back I was busy.  I'd managed to get the cake tin out of the sink and I was licking it clean.  It's a new recipe, but I can safely say that Mary Berry's spicy orange sponge is YUM!  

You know how important it is to make house guests feel welcome, and to treat them as part of the family?  Well, I've decided not to exclude Billy's lovely girlfriend when it comes to little indiscretions and norties.  The other day I managed to pinch the bit of bread she was planning to have with her soup, and the night before last I discovered a half eaten bar of Dairy Milk in her bag.  It wasn't half eaten for long!  They wrestled some wrapper off me and Billy managed to shake a little chocolate from my mouth. I got a very big telling off and my Mum apologised for my behaviour.  I do feel terribly misunderstood, but never mind, 'twas YUM!

Today I managed to squeeze in a little norty before breakfast.  I snuck into the front room, and found the biscuit jar which had been left by the side of the sofa.  I tipped it over, got off the lid and took a chocolate chip digestive.  Ooh, 'twas YUM!  I also wanted a Bourbon biscuit, but My Mum found me, told me off and sent me back to the kitchen.  She told me I didn't deserve my breakfast but decided her life wouldn't be worth living if I spent the day hungry so she relented.  A minor victory, I think you'll agree.   

On Saturday, a lady delivered a very pretty flower arrangement.  She told My Mum that it would need topping up with water and it would be best to do that in the kitchen in case it leaked.  My Mum did just that, and then pushed the arrangement to the back of the worktop out of harm's way.  She went upstairs for just a little while, but became aware of an unusual noise.  Unfortunately for me, she discovered me munching through one of the roses.  She wasn't very pleased and I got a telling off.  Never mind . . . 'twas YUM!